Hello Family!
Time really is flying it is crazy how fast it goes. I am just trying to live up every second out here and am grateful that I still have a week to be a missionary :)
Oh man Steung Mean Chey 3 is a wild ride to say the least. You literally just never know what is going to happen. Unfortunately this week we lost 3 of the people that were supposed to get baptized this week. Botom and Sokom told us that their parents aren't allowing them to get baptized. Originally when we talked with their parents they didn't have a problem. Not sure what changed but their parents won't give permission so hopefully when they are older they can make the decision for themselves. They were so cute.
Also my most favorite YAY :( Yay Suang is having a lot of temptation right now and lots of doubts and discouragement and we don't feel she is ready to get baptized yet. SO SAD! The good news is that I still get to see her all the time because we have a lot of investigators right by her house, but we are giving her a break right now so she can figure out what she wants to do. Satan is working really hard on her. But we also want to make sure she is ready to commit to her Savior for the rest of her life and don't feel she is quite there.
So we were supposed to have a karaoke night as a ward activity. The Cambodians are big karaoke fans, people do it at their houses on the daily so we thought it would be a good idea for some ward unity since our ward is struggling. So the activity was supposed to start at 5 but keep in mind we are on Cambodian time here so basically the elders and sister hafen and I showed up early to set up. 5 o'clock comes around and there are 3 people there. Bishop and the people who were supposed to be running the activity didn't show up until 5:45 and then we didn't even end up doing karaoke but ya know it was still fun.
I have been thinking a lot this week about how we worship a fourth watch God. We have so many people that just say "well sisters I have been doing all these things and changing my life around and I haven't seen any difference, I am not seeing the blessings. My life is still hard and God isn't helping me."
In Mark 6:46-48 it says "And when he had sent them away, he departed into a mountain to pray. And when even was come, the ship was in the midst of the sea, and he alone on the land. And he saw them toiling in rowing; for the wind was contrary unto them: and about the fourth watch of the night he cometh unto them, walking upon the sea."
There are times in our lives when we toil, rowing against the wind. We try so hard to make progress but we feel like there are all these forces against us. There might be some trials that we wish badly to be over, or some blessings we desire with all our hearts, and it doesn't seem as though we are making any headway against the wind and we start to wonder if the Lord is really listening.
But something I think a lot of us need to understand is that Heavenly Father is a fourth watch God. And sometimes we wish and even expect that things would come immediately and we get discouraged and think maybe He isn't listening or maybe He isn't there but in this account it says that he saw them. He was watching and is always watching. He watched them as he watches us toiling in rowing. But ultimately He knows that it will be for our good so we can learn and so we can be prepared to receive His answers. Because sometimes we aren't in a place to receive the answers and Heavenly Father doesn't know where to put these answers to our prayers. But as we struggle and go through these challenges it refines us and creates a way for our Father to reach us, humbling us and preparing us for the reassurance we need.
So when we have trials that are seeming endless, and blessings that aren't coming we just need to assume we haven't reached the fourth watch. He is always there, He is always listening and He always cares about us. We just need to be patient and wait until the fourth watch comes, because it always does. He will never leave us.
I love my Savior and know that He lives, that Father in Heaven cares about us and is always watching after us.